grace...

To me, grace is the perfect word. This word has had such an impact on my self worth and I try to remind myself on a daily basis that grace is a gift. Grace is transcendent just like a few people I have met along the way. Debbie Smith was definitely one of those people.

I met Natalie my freshman year of high school during our JV volleyball tryouts and we became instant friends. Though we did not grow up together, we were inseparable since the day we met. It was like we had known each other for years and that friendship permeated throughout our families. My mom loved Natalie and soon became friends with her parents, Wayne and Debbie. There was a beautiful connection between the three that I still have a hard time explaining. They did not go out on weekends, they did not see each other outside of our sporting events much, but when they saw each other on a weekly basis, it was like they were best of friends, as well. Wayne and Debbie knew the struggles my mom went through to support two children and loved her through her journey. They had a pretty remarkable presence in our lives and I would hear them pray for ease in our day to day when we would have our weekend slumber parties in their home.

Natalie invited me to join Young Life…a weekly ritual of song, dance, laughter and prayer at a local church. I was completely infatuated with the event. I could not get enough of the intoxicating atmosphere and it made it that much better that my friends were all present. I grew up in prayer, but nothing like this. I had no idea God could be so much fun. As I continued to know the Smith family (Wayne, Debbie, Dale, Natalie and David), I learned that much more about YL and what it meant to go to camp. I wanted to be with my friends during that week of extra ministry but my mom could not afford the financial commitment it took to send me there. Even though this was our struggle, Wayne and Debbie took it upon themselves to find a way to send me to YL camp, with Natalie, three summers in a row. To this day, I could not be more thankful and I continue to cherish those memories.

Though Natalie and I were close in high school and the first few years of college, we started to get involved with our own lives and go into two different directions. Different towns, different interests, and different paths withdrew our reach from one another, naturally. My last move to Denver was one of the best moves I have ever made. Within a month of moving, I received a random note on Facebook.

Debbie Smith

Hi--you are not going to believe this but we are getting ready to move to Denver as soon as our house sales! Isn't that crazy! Wayne actually will be flying up there tomorrow to start his new job at a church in Littleton.

Throughout my journey, Debbie always found her way back into my life. She would always drop notes, whether it was an email or letter on Facebook, to let me know she was thinking of my family. She reminded me she was there to pray for me, to chat if needed, and to be sure I was just doing “okay”.

After Wayne and Debbie settled in Denver, we found the time to meet for breakfast before I had a work event, and I was lucky enough to see Natalie for a few hours, as well. What started as “I only have an hour in the morning for a quick breakfast”, turned into three hours of laughter, tears, and sweet stories we had been longing to tell each other after all these years. I was incredibly late for work, but it was worth it…it was beautiful. I missed Natalie…I missed Debbie…and I knew to have the Smith family so close, again, was going to be a blessing.

A few weeks after that breakfast, Debbie had a brain aneurysm and unfortunately, passed away. The family made their way back to the state of Colorado and this would begin a journey of grieving in two different states. Times like these deserve the upmost gentle respect before jumping in and showing support for the family. With Natalie’s blessing, I headed to their house.  Natalie and her dad had just returned from the church where Wayne had just started as the pastor and later, where the Colorado services would be held. It was the first time I had seen Wayne in years and it definitely was not the best timing on my part. Natalie and Wayne turned to me and we all started to cry. We embraced each other in their driveway and walked inside to see the rest of the family and great friends who flew in from Dallas.

The word grace sums up the Smith family in an exceptional nutshell. To this day, they amaze me with their grace through this heartache. They were not angry but thankful that their mom/wife was in a place where she was held by God and smiling down on all of us. She was the epitome of grace and the Smith family continues to carry on that virtue, daily.

I consider myself very lucky. My life has been different/difficult at times but epic. I continue to grow as a person and am thankful for those around me…just like the Smith family. I believe they set part of the foundation for me to find God again after John passed away. I believe Debbie’s laugh that morning, weeks before she passed, reminded me of how happy life can be with God’s spirit in your heart. I believe in so much more now…the greater good, my journey and myself. Though it has been almost a year since she has left this earth, she definitely still has a part in that.